i woke up pretty early today. and im glad i didn't went back to sleep again. maybe waking up early is good cause theres no one to chat to, everyone is asleep and you can do all the things you need to do. where as at night, you are so tempted to chat/youtube/facebook cause during that time its when livefeeds/newsfeed are flooded all over facebook.
i went for a swim yesterday and discovered how fat i was where as anthony had some crazy abs. skinny kids have like super abs. damn i want those abs too. i want to have high metabolism rate too. i wonder why anthony have such a nice temper. soooooo patient and sabar. so is ciputra, so bloody patient. he talks slowly, he talks patiently and apparently can control his emotions under all conditions.
but me...?
haha. im just a god damn sekia; childish. i thought i was matured, actually im not cause i think deep down inside i still act and behave like a kid. i doubt being matured is nothing like ... telling yourself to be matured. you have to go thru some kind of events in order to change?
oh im still jobless, great isnt it.
darwin
奇跡見えない。
I'm on my way back home now from holland v. I don't know why but I have so many things on my mind now but I just can't put what I'm thinking into words. Its reallly weird,
Well. Sometimes I wonder what on earth I'm actually doing. Going out, chutchuting, wasting money and drinking coffee. I don't know what I want, actually I do know what I want but I just don't know the path to getting what I want.
Or is it like what she said my want isn't strong enough? Is that the reason why I'm so easily distracted? It makes me wonder ,seriously...
How come resolutions don't work? How come plans were never executed.
Why? Or am i just too naïve thinking that god will constantly help me all the time? Why. Why why why. Damn. Sent from my BlackBerry Wireless Handheld
darwin
奇跡見えない。
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
why are things getting more complicated as we become older.
sometimes i wish we can just go back to the past. where we can just go on date, pure love ( be it if its puppy love ), pure jealousy. talk about a future that you want to share, talk about the family you want to have. but now, its hard to even talk about it.
things aren't getting more complicated as we grow older, we just need money. i don't know why, but as i grow older each day, im getting more and more certain that money ( wealth ) is the answer to everything, answer to every of my doubts, my questions about life; my solution to everything that i need to solve. be it love life family everything. thats sad, cause it sounds like money is everything, well... since when it isnt?